Skunk Suicide

I've noticed of late an alarming number of skunks laying on the roadside, guts strewn all over the street. I've begun counting the dead skunks on my way to work, and I believe I counted at least 12 this morning. This has lead me to wonder, are the skunks suffering from seasonal depression? Have they decided en mass that they can no longer live with their odor? Why do the skunks want to kill themselves?

It's fairly disturbing to see the sheer number of skunk carcasses in the road. What is more troubling is having to practically drive over a freshly killed skunk. The smell is overwhelming. It almost brings tears to my eyes and I have to stop breathing for a moment from the stench emanating from the dead rodents. It's horrid. Virtually every five miles, maybe less, there is another dead skunk, and that is in an almost 30 mile stretch. So during the entire drive to work there is a constant, lingering odor clouding the air. You can practically see the cloud of green stink mingling with the fog that hangs over the fields and farmlands.

Do the skunks know something we don't? Should I be interpreting this behavior as a sign of the end times? It's very disconcerting to witness such senseless carnage and not be able to prescribe a meaning to it. Clearly something is bothering the skunks to the point where they feel compelled to throw themselves in front of oncoming vehicles. I intend to get to the bottom of this mystery. It may take months, years even, but I am determined to uncover the source of the skunks' angst. And while I may not be able to cure it, I'm sure there are skunk researchers and scientists who will be anxious to remedy this tragic situation. Or perhaps the world will end and we'll know the skunks were trying to tell us something.